[cherokeebd]

Some claim the 'puter is the greatest invention,
With cars, phones and 'lectric'ty gittin some mention,
But if trouble knocks and push'em comes to shove'em,
I rank my li'l Kel-Tec over and above'm.

Yep, got little to do before church on a February Sunday mornin.

Cherokee

 

[cherokeebd]

Why, Sir, you're as good a hand at limerickin as ever I saw. My feeble effort at hillbillionic rhymin now pales when read with your line serving as its last.

However, before offering the lucrative contract we sometimes hand out to top lim'rickers roun' heah and to assure all that you ain't just a flash in the proverbial pan............

Lim'ricks are trivial matters, but still,
They can get plumb interesting, and will,
When, like embers not merely left to die,
They are given a new fuel supply..............

Chero-redindafacecauseIdunbinout-limrickt-kee

 

[cherokeebd]

Guess some folks have already realized that simple minds (like mine) are easily entertained, especially during bad weather. So, can anyone provide diversion from the snow by adding a final line that rhymes with lines 1 & 2 (like JFB did), making these simple ditties into limericks?

Foreign wars were not won using K.T.A.R.s,
Neither are Kel-Tecs packed by Western movie stars,
The James brothers nor the Kid never heard the name,
But lately, Kel-Tec has begun to gain in fame.............

Or:

Whoever heard tell of the Indianap'lis Kel-Tecs
Or poured Kel-Tec 3AT Malt Liquor straight down their necks?
If they can ever git their name out, like old Sam Colt done,
The world might start to realize that Kel-Tec builds a gun..........

Cherokee

 

[cherokeebd]

Because their advertising is better than NPR's

That is worth more in a fight than Ahnold's pecs

Both good'uns, r080. ;D

Cherokee

 

[cherokeebd]

Attaboy, granpa. Great limerick concerning a possible problem as we age!

I'm retired, live in a very rural area, and hope to turn 64 in March. I don't often get caught without my snub S&W .357 J-frame, snub 629, or a 1911. Hope it never happens, but if I should have only my P-3AT and encounter ONE of the sweet characters you mention, I plan to suggest that we play "Doctor" and offer him a recommended prescription.

Three hundred pounds, over six feet high,
Scowling, aint-looking-for-work type guy.
Wants an old man's dough, starts to move close.
Don't listen, he'll get the TOO-TOO DOSE
Of three to the mouth, TOO-TOO each eye.

Let's hope he'll have a good night's sleep.

Cherokee

 

[cherokeebd]

Wrote my last'n in a hurry. In case it came across as confusin, the latter part of that last line means "two to each eye".

jdog, a buddy from another forum who lurks but rarely speaks, says "K.T.A.R." from a post back up the page, should probably have been written "K.-T.A.R." as it referred to the imagined Kel-Tec version of the Browning Automatic Rifle (B.A.R.) of foreign war fame.

Just funnin around, BillK. Hope this kinda post is no distraction to serious forum users. If it eats up too much band-width (band length :-???.....like I know what that is!) or is otherwise a nuisance, just say so. Can't speak for the others, but I certainly won't be offended.

Cherokee

 

[cherokeebd]

Good, BillK. Then I wanna tell oldgranpa my plan if I'm totin only my P-3AT and meet up with 2 or more of the fellers he described. ;D

Bump a drugged-out doper in the mall, that's just fine.
His cronies stand, one foot on the wall, in a line.
Ere he goes into one of them drug-induced rants,
I offer to trade him for his baggy-x$$ pants,
Cause there's a awful aroma coming from mine.

A old Cherokee who got that way cause he don't NEVAH wear nothin that impedes runnin.

 

[cherokeebd]

I agree, granpa, ansursvary's right. That answer never varies (only the slightest pun intended, BillK) and is the reason I practice way more than a double-tap to the area of the eyes, nose, and mouth. I've timed this drill with my Model 60. Groups shot with my Crimson Trace sight installed are always at least a fraction of a precious second quicker than my (iron-sighted) point-and-shoot times. In dim light and even at a mere arm's length, the accuracy improves measurably. Especially when packing .38s or .380s, I want to be able to take advantage of the entryways into the skull that don't require a lot of power to achieve penetration.

As to some of my opinions expressed above, they are worth about what you paid for'em. It's just that I have serious issues with some of the principles of "double-tap and assess". YMMV. Please be aware, if you don't live in my county, that a perp shot plumb full of holes may or may not require some courtroom skills that are beyond my realm of instruction. ;D

As to home invasion prevention, we keep a Rhodesian Ridgeback (named Mohawk for his organic hairdo). He teams with an ill- natured female terrier-mix (think Airedale, but smaller). She never naps at night and together, they've proven priceless, whether we're at home or away.

Teeth marks and tears will appear purple and deep
On the calves, thighs, and bruised backside of the creep
By the time he so rudely breaks down my door.
Ol 'Hawk's but one reason I that can be sure
Bloody'll be the creep who dares disturb my sleep.

I ain't paranoid, granpa, I just don't want my old clothes tore up, and you probably knew ****** keep dawgs anyway.

Cherokee

 

[cherokeebd]

Would someone who is at least semi-computer literate please tell me how to retrieve a P.M.? :-[ :-?

Thanks,

Cherokee

 

[cherokeebd]

Thanks, BillK.

I'm also very impressed with both your and olgranpa's familiarity with a legendary firearm I've only had the good fortune to "handle" for a matter of days. I've never forgotten the "feel" of a B.A.R., though.

Cherokee

 

[cherokeebd]

The ammo's loaded. (It is really a breeze!)
Pull off my shirt (for reasons other than Chris Lee's).
Four-wheel up a holler to an old mining strip.
Load up the little Kel-Tec and just let'er rip.
But not today. Temperature: seven degrees.

Cherokee

 

[cherokeebd]

The cannon barrage at Gettysburg, ordered by Gen'ral Lee,
The stirring roar of the crowd when Secretariat broke free,
Niag'ra's Falls, the thunder's roll, all noises that know few bounds,
And a hundred other rackets are considered deaf'ning sounds.
How can it be lonesome silence is, by far, louder to me?

Cherokee

 

[cherokeebd]

​

TWO-HUNDRED FIFTY BUCKS WELL INVESTED?

Though it came in in second place when shot at full throttle,
I still think my li'l Kel-Tec is lightnin in a bottle.
I can hide it where the devil would be hard put to find it,
After three boxes I have not had even one shell bind it,
And don't feel quite as helpless, even though I still doddle.

(Not hardly as helpless) Cherokee

 

[cherokeebd]

To stay alive, my people, in the not too distant past,
Had to work, ev'ry day, at being accurate and fast,
Whether taking food or guarding home with stick and string or knife.
Amazing how much a P-3AT could have better'd life
In their precious homeland within the Smoky Mountains, vast.

Cherokee